TMI Thursdays - Sex makes babies? WHAT!

Once again, thanks to LiLu I have decided to join the ranks in TMI Thursdays. Is it too late? Meh. But here we are.. and well, here we go.

None of us like the think that our parents have sex, at least I don't know a being that accepts that. I for one am a firm believer that my parents are still virgins, and that I just suddenly appeared on their doorstep. Call it juvenile, or what have you. Say that sex is a part of life, whatever. But just the mere thought of my parents getting it on is all kinds of wrong in my head. ALL KINDS OF WRONG.

And because I have some of the best luck known to man, I was proven WRONG on the implication that my parents don't have sex. And I was proven wrong at an age where projectile vomiting could accompany the knowledge (which it did). I would have cared to learn so in a different way, a gentler way, but god was not so kind.

The tender (or not so tender) age of sixteen is sacred to all females. We're beginning to date, some of us losing our virginity, experimenting with alcohol or whathave you. This particular night was no different. I remember being at a party, and I remember tasting vodka for the first time ever. And then it was my first extremely sloppy night. Immediately I phoned home to let my parents know that I was indeed sleeping over my best friends house. However, between the wee hours of midnight and 2 am (you know, young and sloppy) I decided that I preferred the comfort of my bed to that of the floor of some strangers house. After many phonecalls and pleading, I was dropped off at my house. Ladies and gents - what happened next, I hope no one ever experiences in their life.

I quietly open the door. Close it behind me. I hear squeaking. What is that noise? I'm drunk - whatever. I stumble slowly through the the foyer, looking for a light. Switch it on. ALAS, there they are. My parents.. in all of their nakedness.. getting down and dirty.. on the very couch I had spent endless nights staying up watching TV on.

And then I remember feeling woozy, and I threw up all that vodka on the floor. And refused to speak to my parents for an entire week.